Advice on Pets, Life, Love
By Monica Collins
Dear Dog Lady,
I have a great eight-year-old Airedale but after seven-and-one-half years, he has developed separation anxiety whenever we leave home. We have left him a Kong. We leave the TV jon. He has been to the veterinarian and no physical problems. The vet has tried meds but the drugs really haven't worked. He is fine if we leave him at someone else's home alone because our friend also has a dog. He just can't handle being home alone and he's fine otherwise. Any ideas to get him over this.
--Greg
Dear Greg.
It's tough to get a dog over the hump of separation anxiety. And, obviously, you are employing many remedies. Yet, have you tried ignoring him? Do not make a big deal out of comings and goings. Just come and go and disregard the Airedale. Do not greet him with great fanfare when you come home; nor should you say goodbye, merely walk out of the house.
Yes, this no-drama strategy will be hard to accomplish but you must try. From what Ask Dog Lady has learned, our canines are extremely keyed into us. If they sense any sort of anxiety on our part, it can cause them to be anxious too. Try to be completely chill around the Airedale whenever you're in transition.
Dear Dog Lady,
My divorce attorney has a small shaggy dog named Lilliput that sits in on meetings. When I first started seeing the lawyer, I resented this and thought it was very unprofessional. Now, I couldn't bear to be without Lilliput being somewhere in the room while I go over the grim details of my broken marriage and what kind of financial settlement I want. I am also thinking of getting a dog as I move in to a new place and begin my single life after 33 years of dog-less marriage. The kids are all grown. Can you recommend a kind of dog that would be a good match for a newly single 58-year-old woman?
--Colleen
Dear Colleen,
Consider the old expression that acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative. Fie on Ask Dog Lady to exert an opinion about what could be the most important choice in your post-divorce life. Only you can answer the questions and make the choice about your new roommate. Small or large? Purebred or mutt? Older dog or puppy? Shaggy or short hair? Shelter or rescue?
Know this: It will be a lot of work. There is no such thing as a dog that doesn't want to be walked. Some dogs need more exercise than others. Your dog will require you to get off the couch and put one foot in front of the other every day. This will greatly improve your social life at a time you need it most.
You also must train the dog to do everything you want your dog to do-from socializing with other dogs, to walking on the leash, and maintaining proper potty manners. Have a ball.
Dear Dog Lady,
An uppity friend of my sister-in-law lives in our neighborhood. Amy has two dogs and she doesn't pick up. My husband was home from work one morning and he saw both dogs squatting on a little patch of grass outside our house. After they did their business, Amy didn't bother scooping. My husband was angry. Instead of confronting her, he wrote her this poem and left it in her mailbox wrapped in a baggie:
"I saw you walk/I saw you stop/I saw your dogs make a drop!/I don't mind dew upon my grass/In fact, it's what it needs/But doo from dogs is bad for grass/In fact, it kills the seeds/So if you walk/And if you stop/A bag is what you need/Cause walking and dropping without stopping/Is un-neighborly and just plain mean!/XO, Your neighbor, David."
She hasn't talked to us since and she's still seen walking in the neighborhood and not picking up. One of these days, I'll muster the energy to say something to her. Can you think of the perfect thing to say?
--Lisa
Dear Lisa,
Your husband said it all very cleverly. If his poem in a baggie didn't jar Amy's conscience, nothing will. When she flouts her responsibility to do the right thing for her neighbors, her dogs and herself, the woman lacks an inner compassion compass. You might ask her if she'd like to receive another poem in her mailbox, but why bother. Any interaction with her might invite rage and bad feelings. If she continues to leave doo all over the neighborhood, call the local authorities, report her, and be done with it. And say a secret prayer so her dogs eventually soften her brittle nature.
Visit askdoglady.com and read the new blogs, "Shorty Knows" and "The Dexter Diaries."